Funny stuff

Kolbe quotes: "Can I watch the guy with the green head?" -The movie Shrek
"Close the door, Libby, don't come in, I've gotta have some private area." -trying to do his business in the bathroom
In church Grandpa leaned over and whispered to Kolbe to stop talking so loudly. He responded, "Mommy told me to be good at church, but I forgot."
"I didn't know she could open and shut." Libby was playing with something he had hidden inside a box so she wouldn't mess with.
I was trying to get a few things done the other day and Kolbe wanted some water. I told him I would get it soon. He was getting restless and after a couple of minutes I said, "You're being very patient." He countered, "No I'm not cuz I'm hollering."
We checked out a Bert and Ernie CD from the library. It has been permanantly banned now because we couldn't hear any of the singing over Kolbe asking, "Was that Bert or Ernie?" after every word that was said or sung. He must have asked that question a hundred times before I just couldn't take it anymore.
Kolbe was tormenting Elizabeth and got put into time out. I set the timer for 3 minutes. After his time was up he brought the timer to me and asked, "How do I get this timer to work for when I do something else to her?"
Back when Janelle was home she was watching the kids and I told her they could have a little P-U-D-D-I-N-G, spelling it so Kolbe wouldn't badger her. As soon as I left he asked Janelle if he could have some P-U-D-E. When it came time to give the treat, she jokingly opened the fridge and got out a cucumber. He said, "That's no treat, come on, Janelle." When she did give him the pudding, he ate a few bites and said, "This is too much pudding, if I eat all this I'll throw up." Janelle said she'd put it away and he could have it tomorrow. He replied, "I cant' even finish it tomorrow." Evidently he doesn't much like pudding.
He thinks he's getting pretty sneaky. He hasn't been allowed to suck a binky for quite some time now, but he is such an addict he will still go hide somewhere to suck one if he finds one of Libby's hanging around. Once in a while I find one he has stashed under his pillow. How do I find it?
When we are getting ready for bed he says, "There aren't any binky's hiding under my pillow."
At dinnertime if there is something he doesn't want to eat he says, "I don't love _____" Fill in the blank with brocolli or fish, etc. Lately he will eat some chicken, he likes chicken strips or nuggets. I served him baked chicken the other day and he said, "This isn't chicken nuggets this is real chicken."
On my birthday Gma B asked Kolbe if he sang Happy Birthday to his mom. He said "No, she sang happy birthday to herself."
Yesterday we had oatmeal and there was a little burned oat in the bowl. He said, "Oh no, it's a button, it's a spider, it's something like that."
He was demonstrating spinning for Libby last week and after spinning several times he abruptly stopped and said, "Why is this house moving?"
We were coming out of a store and I had the kids in the double stroller -awkward to get in and out of narrow doorways. A woman went out ahead of us and Kolbe yelled out to her, "Hey lady, can you hold the door open for my mom?!?"